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Kerry V., Australia

I don’t know about the ‘screening’ process as I have had people in the past where I believed were going to be terrible and have turned out to be the best students/families. Then ones I thought would be great left out of the blue. It is probably more about the managing of these people when you have them rather than ridding potential allies for your studio.

What I usually do in the FIS is tell the parents/adults what I expect of them. That if they feel uncomfortable about it then SM with me is not for them. They usually enroll.

Nicole O., California

I’ve recently been asking myself the same question because, like you, I’ve run into stressful/difficult situations that could have been avoided had I done a better job at screening prospective students.

I had an interesting situation occur last week. Two different people inquired about lessons via email. I responded by asking them questions about their musical background, their musical goals, their expectations, why they want to take lessons and so on. This started a cyber dialogue that resulted in one deciding that she’d prefer to learn how to read notes because she had done that in the past and her goal was to learn how to play a specific song. She did, however, thank me for the information and helping her get clear about what she wants. The other has said that he needs to mull the information over. He too, had mentioned that he’d like to read notes. In the past, I have tried to change myself and the program to fit what the person wants by hurrying them through. That has resulted in those students NOT learning the learning strategies effectively. My actions diminished the importance of the learning strategies because I wanted to please the new student. I’ve done this in other areas as well, but I’ll stick to this example for now:)

Since I’ve started participating in the Teaching From the Future coaching calls, I’ve become more aware of my part in the learning or not learning of each student, and also in the compliance or non-compliance of each student. It’s important to me, now, to be very clear about what they want and expect and what I can offer.

Cindy B., Illinois

If I’m approached by a relative of a child, who doesn’t live with the child, there’s a good chance they won’t enroll because I insist upon a live in caregiver to attend lessons.

Victoria S., California

I have come to this same conclusion that I need to be selective about students. I, too, am curious as to how other teachers handle this issue.

I have set some guidelines for myself, still in process. For example, I no longer will attempt to teach students who are not excited about the program at the FIS. If it is the parents’ idea, but the child is obviously resistant, I flat out don’t want them.

Once they have started, if the parent is non-cooperative and it shows in their attitude during lessons as well as in the performance of the child (some kids are motivated even if the parent is not cooperative), which is usually the case, I let them know that I am a requirement based studio, not a request based studio, and if they are not coming into alignment with what needs to happen to achieve the results promised, I let them know it is not working. Before I let them go, I ask questions to find out if there is anything we can do to work together to make the experience work for everyone. If not, I am relieved not to have them in my studio. Those are always the ones that take the most time and energy with little return.

I also do not feel badly when good students need to stop coming for various reasons, but would like to come back when things are going more smoothly in their lives, such as an adult whose work and personal life becomes too hectic for a period of time, or a student who has taken on too many other programs, such as sports, ballet, etc. and is not able to practice enough to make it worth their while for a certain time frame, or a family in unexpected crisis. Usually those folks do want to return and I would definitely take them back under appropriate circumstances.

The students who have been my worst nightmares seem to have a common thread – there is a conflict going on within the family, usually between the student and the Life Coach, or between the Life Coach and the person who is actually paying for the lessons with the student as the pawn, and I have to expend large amounts of energy to keep myself out of it if I want to keep them as a student. I have come to recognize those quickly now and I am not interested in the least.

I also notice a pattern with some families where there is always a crisis resulting in missed lessons.

Then there are the parents who are impatient to have reading music begin. I find that these are, so far, parents who do not want to be involved in the process and it is easier to drop their kids off at a lesson with a traditional teacher.

You get the idea.

The ones that do stay and truly want to learn as well as have involved Life Coaches are a joy that goes beyond words. Both the student and the parent are appreciative of the opportunity and understand how phenomenal the program is. They are worth it all.

Tami D., Indiana

I too, have thought about becoming more selective. And especially more requirement based from the beginning. However, recently I had a mom start her 10-year-old son on lessons and he didn’t seem to be the least bit interested. But after just a few weeks he really seems to be enjoying it! He asked me the other day when his mom wasn’t present, “How long am I going to be taking piano lessons?” I said, ” I guess however long your mom wants you to.” He said, “I hope it’s a long time”.

Mary R., Michigan

I was just reflecting on a class of four where I let a mom bully me into starting the reading process much earlier than I ever have before or feel comfortable with. All four have now quit and though each had separate reasons, I truly believe that my failure to stay true to the method played a big role.

I agree that it is impossible to predict which students/families will be successful with SM in the long term. I do believe, however, that we must know what works for us and not waver from that in order to gain more students. The fact that SM is a remarkable, breakthrough method still doesn’t mean that it’s for everyone. If we are very clear upfront about our policies and expectations it gives potential students a better chance of making the right choice for them.