Simpedia

Kylie S., NSW, Australia

I teach my husband and my sons together in one class with another young friend. He is the only adult. It works really well. I think it depends on the attitude of the parent to a large degree, being the older in a group of younger kids.

Patti P., Hawaii

I have a class that is a mother and two sons. Originally it was the father, but he found his work schedule made it impossible to be consistent, so the mom stepped in. She had some previous piano, so she was able to catch up on the pieces over time. So far it’s working quite well.

Sheri R., California

If I have a child who doesn’t match with a class and the parent wants to take with their child I will put both of them in a two person class and have them both pay.

However, anytime a parent wants to learn with their child and the child is in a shared lesson, I tell the parent that they can learn for free. But in this scenario they don’t get piano time on a regular basis, just active observers, which they should be doing anyway.

When parents learn along with their young children it’s a good opportunity for the child to mentor their parent at home, and therefore learn the content even more deeply. I’ve told parents before to play when kids are at school so they can ask the child for “help.” In other words, they don’t let on that they know it already. It’s a great esteem booster for the child to be able to teach a parent something, sort of a rare event for most kids! And of course if the parent really hasn’t learned it yet, that works too.

Usually children pass their parents up, but in cases where that isn’t happening, I think it’s probably a good idea for a parent not to excel too much in their child’s presence as that can backfire for some children.

Teach them lots of duets!

Fiona H., Australia

I have lots of parent/child combos. I give them 35 mins for 2 person shared, each a full paying student. Each with commitment to practice with their own set practice times. For all mine I have found it works well- both parent and child have the support of each other (or they compete with each other) and there is a closeness that develops by sharing a hobby together that is all about long term relationship. Strengths and weaknesses of each student balances out as the months go by. For over confident parents, I tell them it’s a lot to assume that they will overshadow their offspring- usually as time goes by, it’s the opposite that happens!! Progress is pretty good with these combos.

It’s also easier from scheduling perspective – only have to have 1 family available for that timeslot and makes it much easier if need to coordinate future lesson changes!!

Sharon I., Australia

I have two sets of mother and child groups and it really is fantastic to see them learn and share together.

Jennifer L., California

I do have a little experience with this scenario, so I thought I’d chime in.

I have one mother/daughter pairing who’ve been with me for several years, and it’s been very successful. Each of them excels in different arenas, and they’re usually able to support one another really well as a result of that. When I have my annual Halloween music party, they participate fully – both not only performing for everyone, but also going full-on with some really fabulous costumes. It’s a joy to watch them together.

I had another such pairing some years back that didn’t last long. The daughter who was seven years old was prone to tantrums, and the mom allowed it, continually asking me not to say anything because she didn’t want her daughter to have any negative associations with this activity they were doing together. Oy! After a couple of incidents, I took the reins back, set some very clear boundaries, and the reaction this little girl had was astounding. I made it clear (in a very loving, nonjudgmental way) that her behavior was unacceptable and that we could carry on and have some fun at the piano when she chose to work within my structure. She then came back to the piano, put her arms around me and said, “Thank you for teaching me. I love you. I want to learn.”

I’m deeply grateful to Neil for the guidance he gives us in realm of “claiming territory” that enabled me to manage that situation and to have such a beautiful and fulfilling outcome in that moment. Unfortunately, they discontinued lessons shortly thereafter. I think the mom (who was a lovely person and for whom I have tremendous compassion) felt shown up, which, of course, was not my intention at all. Nonetheless, I’m so happy to have had that experience which showed me, with abundant clarity, how powerful and positive setting appropriate boundaries is.

I’ve digressed a bit here. But my overall feeling about the parent/child shared lesson is a positive one. I recommend that you give it a try. For every pairing, the dynamic will be different. And, no matter what, you’ll learn and grow as a result of taking on a new challenge.

Katy S., Australia

I have a mom who is taking lesson with her 4.5 yrs old son doing PAS and she does SM level 2 now. The little boy takes 20 minutes and mom takes 30 minutes. The boy in the meantime plays with his toys or reads. His dad too accompanies them. A very disciplined child. It works fine.

Amy L., Australia

I was one of those kids paired with her mum! It was fantastic fun.

To give you some background though – I had already learnt classically, completed up to Grade 6 in AMEB Exams and then started the SM program at 14 as my teacher was converting over. Mom learned as a kid and had forgotten most of it so I did the lessons with her for a few years to help her along.

It was great for me to learn blues, contemporary, ballads, accompaniment – things I wouldn’t have known from classical. Mum and I worked well together and were able to encourage each other at home. If she needed a memory jog – I could provide that. It was also fun in class.

In this scenario I had the upper hand with my background, but in a normal scenario a mum would have the upper hand. It’s rewarding and self-gratifying when you can help someone else out and play duets together. I’m sure parent/children teams would love the experience, as I did.